Torchwood Karaoke
by ebineez01
Summary: The gang need to wind down after work and head to the pub


It had been a hard day and everyone needed some down time to cool off and relax; as they entered the pub Tosh saw a sign on the wall.

"Hey look," she began. "Karaoke tonight; anyone keen to have a go?"

They all pretty much groaned in unison as they looked back at her.

"No way you'd be gettin' me up there! You sound like you're pretty keen though Tosh," scoffed Owen as he walked towards the bar to get the first round.

The colour rose in Tosh's cheeks. "No, no…just saw the sign that's all. Thought we might have a star in our midst."

"How 'bout you then Gwen?" asked Ianto as he sat on the stool next to her.

"Ah…no! I don't think so Ianto," she replied.

Jack looked at her. "Oh…there's a story there," he smiled.

Gwen rolled her eyes. "If you must know – I've heard some pretty horrific stories of my past attempts at Karaoke – but since I don't remember any of them – I'll deny everything!" she replied with a laugh.

"So you do get up there then!?" said Ianto smiling.

"Only when I'm that plied with alcohol I don't have the willpower to stop myself," Gwen replied, then immediately wished she hadn't.

Jack leaned over from her other side and whispered in her ear, "that can so be arranged."

"Don't even think about it Jack – no way I'm getting up there tonight!"

Jack held up his hands in surrender. "Whatever you say." He pretended to lose interest in Gwen then, turning his attentions to Ianto.

"You having a go Ianto? I'll bet those lovely Welsh vowels could do wonders in song!"

"I only ever sing in the shower," Ianto replied, pointedly looking at Jack.

"That is so too much information!" grumbled Owen as he joined them. "Listen," he continued, "I don't mind you two shaggin' – but keep the details to yourselves."

"Oh I dunno," interrupted Gwen. "I wouldn't mind some details occasionally."

Jack lifted an eyebrow and smiled seductively at her. "That invitation is a standing one you know," he said, referring to a few days ago when she had accidentally interrupted Ianto and himself in the greenhouse and he had told her that there was always room for one more.

Ianto raised his eyebrows at this, but said nothing.

They were all having a good time laughing at and singing along with the brave souls who dared to get up on stage; as the night wore on, Jack kept an interested eye on Gwen to see whether she looked like she was loosening up enough to have a go. He didn't know why he was so interested in seeing her up there – but he had a feeling it'd be worth it.

Tosh and Owen moved to a lounge over by the fireplace; Jack smiled as he watched them talking in low voices, heads together. He hoped it would work out for Owen and Tosh, they'd both had a hard time of it recently; he had seen the changes in them this year and they seemed good together. He then looked to Ianto; the Welshman wasn't really one who could hold his drink, and as the result of playing a rather silly drinking game with Gwen – where they'd had to have a shot of some non-descript alcohol every time Jack had supposedly flirted with someone – he was quite understandably legless.

"Come on Ianto," Jack said as he rose from his stool. "Time for you to go home."

At the feel of Jacks hands on him Ianto sat up and smiled. "You takin' me home Jack?" he slurred.

"Not tonight," Jack replied as he wrapped Iantos arm around his shoulder. "I think you need the sleep tonight; I'll get you a taxi."

Ianto started to protest, but couldn't remember what about; so he let Jack lead him out of the pub. Jack poured him into a waiting taxi, giving the driver instructions and a sizeable tip to make sure he got inside his flat.

When he went back into the pub, Tosh and Owen had gone; he smiled to himself, hoping they enjoyed the rest of their night. The smile widened as he then realised that it was just him and Gwen left; the same smile disappeared however when he looked to their table to see Gwen had gone as well.

"Damn it," he said as he looked around the pub – Gwen was nowhere in sight. He slumped back down on his stool – extremely disappointed.

"Hey!"

Jack started at the loud voice in his ear; he spun to see Gwen standing – just – behind him.

"Why so glum chum?" she asked in a sing-song voice.

Jack smiled at her. "I thought you'd gone and left me," he replied, giving her the best 'puppy-dog' look he could muster, pout and all.

Gwen wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'd never leave you," she whispered loudly in his ear. She then made an attempt to reseat herself on her stool; Jack reached out a hand just in time to stop her hitting the floor.

"Whoa!" he said holding onto her to steady her. Looking around Jack saw some tables with chairs instead of stools had emptied; he decided it might be safer to move.

"Come on Gwen."

"Where're we going?" she asked as she played with the buttons of his shirt.

Jack looked down as she popped one, then another. "Bad, bad thoughts!" he said to himself.

"Just over there to that table," he said, pointing.

"Oh, okay," she replied, smiling up at him.

When he'd settled her at the table, Jack went to get some more drinks; he'd been on water all night and now decided that one wouldn't hurt. He'd just returned to the table and passed Gwen her drink, when the Karaoke DJ's voice came over the speakers.

"And now let's welcome up to the stage for the first time - Gwen!"

"Yeah! That's me!" Gwen yelled as she jumped up out of her chair.

Jack looked stunned. "You?"

"Yeah!" Gwen yelled back over her shoulder as she headed for the stage. "I went up and put my name down when you and Ianto went outside."

"Oh this should be good," Jack said to himself; he decided he wanted an uninterrupted view, so he moved to a table right near the stage.

Jack was riveted to Gwen as she climbed up onto the stage and went to talk to the DJ.

"Oh shit!" he said out loud as the familiar music started. "I knew this was going to be good!" The thought to go up and stop her crossed his mind briefly – this could be very embarrassing! The thought however was very fleeting as Gwen began to move with the music.

And then - it began.

"I love myself, I want you to love me,

When I feel down, I want you above me"

"She's actually pretty good," Jack thought as Gwen sang – directly to him as it happened. He smiled – he liked Gwen and Karaoke!

"I don't want anybody else,

When I think about you I touch myself"

"Oh God," Jack thought as Gwen started to move her hips suggestively, running a hand up her thigh.

"You're the one who makes me come running"

Gwen moved down the stage steps, making her way towards Jack.

Jack couldn't help the way his body was reacting as Gwen moved towards him; the way she was looking at him; he'd never seen Gwen move her body like that before.

"Why did I let her do this?!" he asked himself desperately, when on reaching him she spun, and was currently moving her tightly jean clad - and somewhat magnificent he thought – arse seductively from side to side about six inches from his face.

"I wanna make you mine," the song continued.

Then to Jacks great relief, Gwen spun back around.

"I close my eyes, and see you before me,

Think I would die, if you were to ignore me"

"Kinda hard to do right now," thought Jack, staring up at her.

"A fool could see, just how much I adore you"

Then Jack nearly fell backwards out of his chair when Gwen dropped to her knees between his legs.

"I'd get down on my knees, I'd do anything for you" Her hand caressing his thigh – very high up on his thigh Jack noted – her eyes wide and innocent as she sang these more than suggestive lyrics to him.

"I don't want anybody else,

When I think about you I touch myself" she continued as she ran her hand along his thigh and up, fleetingly across her breast.

"I really need to stop this…" he thought as he continued to stare at Gwen, mesmerised. "Really…stop…now…"

All thought abandoned him however when with the next line, Gwen raised herself up and straddled his lap, beginning to grind herself on him in time to the music just as the spoken section of the song started; sounding now for all the world like she was just talking to him rather than singing a song.

"I want you,

I don't want anybody else,

And when I think about you I touch myself."

Jack was for once in his very long life – speechless; he couldn't form words – he couldn't move.

Gwen managed to finish the song, then she promptly passed out where she sat – still on top of him – her head on his shoulder.

"Ahh – a little help here," called Jack as he took the microphone from her limp hand.

The DJ came down and took the mike from him. "Blimey; that was some performance your girl just put on!"

Jack tried to muster a smile for the guy. "Yeah – quite a show."

"Okay – now what the hell do I do?" Jack asked himself as he put his arms around Gwen to stop her gradual slide off his lap.

He moved her, with some difficulty to the chair next to him, and tried in vain to wake her up.

"Shit!" he said out loud. "Not like I can exactly send her home to Rhys like this," he thought. "But can I take her back to the Hub? Could I trust myself if she came to and tried something?"

Jack looked at her, where she was peacefully sleeping, her head on the table, and smiled. "Yes," was his unequivocal answer. If she were sober and in charge of her faculties and she tried it on with him – then no way he would say no; but tonight? There was no way he would take advantage of her like that.

Jack was thinking how best to get Gwen back to the Hub, when the barman came over and told him it was closing time. He looked at her – she was still completely comatose.

"Well," he said out loud to her slumbering form, "not much choice I'm afraid." He leant down and pushed her back on her chair, then lifted her into his arms.

Half way across the square Jack was starting to feel the strain in his arms a little; not that Gwen was anywhere near heavy – but it would've been much easier to have her slung over his shoulder. Some part of his brain however told him that would be a bad idea as thoughts of cave men carrying unconscious cave women back to their – well caves, ran through his mind; and if Gwen ever found out – it wouldn't be worth his living – and since he couldn't die – well! You get the picture.

Jack stopped at a bench and laid Gwen down on it for a moment to give his arms a rest; he walked off a little way, taking a few deep breaths, shaking his arms; when he turned back – Gwen was gone.

"Holy crap!" Jack yelled. "Gwen!"

He heard giggling coming from the other side of one of the sculptures in the square.

Jack put his hands on his hips – he really wasn't in the mood for this; although the thought of chasing an uninhibited Gwen around for a while did bring a smile to his lips.

"Oh Gwweeen," he sang.

Again, the giggle in reply.

"I know where you are," he said as he stuck his head around the sculpture.

"No you don't!" she answered, then slapped her hands over her mouth as she realised she'd given herself away.

"Come on Gwen, time to go and get some rest," Jack said as her reached for her.

"No!" Gwen yelled as she jumped up and evaded his grasp.

"How can she move that fast with that much alcohol in her?" he thought, as he followed her across the square.

"I don't want to go home!" yelled Gwen as she jumped up onto the barrier to the Bay.

"Oh shit! Gwen – come down off the wall – you don't want to fall in the water!"

Gwen turned around and looked out over Cardiff Bay – the lights reflecting off the surface. "Pretty lights," she said dreamily as she fell forward into an almost graceful dive.

Jack reached the wall as she hit the water; throwing off his jacket he jumped in after her. Sheer terror flooded his heart as he jumped; if she went too far under the water – he might not be able to find her in the dark.

Luckily her big winter jacket was acting as a sort of life jacket, keeping her buoyant. When Jack reached her – she seemed to be pretending she was some type of goldfish.

Jack slung an arm around her chest from behind, doing a very passable impression of a lifesaver as he pulled her to the nearby steps and back up to solid ground. Laying her on the ground, he slumped down beside her; after a moment, catching his breath, he turned to her.

"What the HELL were you thinking!?"

"What!?" she replied, clearly thinking he was insane for dragging her out of the water like that. "I felt like going for a swim!"

"You could've drowned!" he yelled.

"Oh Jack," she cried. "You – are such a drama queen!"

At the incredulous look on his face, she giggled – again!

Shaking his head, Jack got to his feet, he pulled Gwen up and wrapped her in his greatcoat; pulling her arm around his waist, he helped her the rest of the way back to the Hub.

Gwen had regained enough control of her movements for Jack to be able to get her down into his room, where he sat her on the chair while he went back out to grab some towels. Jack started to dry her hair, when Gwen started to moan; he stopped what he was doing – the sound doing bad things to him.

"No, Jack – don't stop – that feels so good," Gwen complained when he took the towel away from her head.

"I'm going to hell for this," he said under his breath as he started drying her hair again; to which Gwen's response was to promptly restart her moaning. When Jack had done the best he could to dry her hair, he thought about putting her to bed as she was.

"You'll catch you're death if I let you stay in those clothes," he said to her.

She sat there, smiling at him; this was almost too much for him.

"Gwen." Gwen's eyes seemed to focus on him.

"We need to get those wet clothes off you before you get into bed – you'll catch pneumonia if we leave them on," Jack said.

Gwen nodded solemnly. "Okay Jack."

"Ohhh…" Jack thought, "I could say anything to her right now and she'd agree! BEHAVE!"

When Gwen didn't move, he tried again. "Gwen, do you think you can get out of your clothes?"

"Okay Jack," she replied dreamily.

Jack watched for a moment as Gwen struggled to get her hands to take her jacket off; he scrubbed his hands over his face.

"Do you want me to help you?" he asked.

Gwen turned back to face him and nodded her head. "Yes please."

Jack moved to the chair and started to take Gwen's jacket off; which proved a rather difficult task as she seemed to be made of rubber all of a sudden.

"Gwen," he admonished, sounding like a parent at the end of their wits. "Stay still will you!?"

There came that giggle that had become so familiar to Jack over the last few hours.

Jack sighed heavily and gave an eye roll that would have made it into the Guinness Book of Records.

Finally he managed to get Gwen's jacket off, along with her shoes and socks.

"Okay," he said out loud. "This is where it gets a little tricky."

Taking a deep breath, he decided the best way to tackle it from here would be like the best way to remove a band aid – fast!

"Ironic," he thought to himself. "This isn't quite how I imagined my taking Gwen's clothes off for the first time."

He grabbed Gwen's shirt and pulled it off over her head; then without pause he pushed her back undid her jeans and pulled them off over her feet.

"Red!" he thought. "And lacy! Ohhh! When did I become so outrageously moral?"

"Okay Gwen," he said. "Time for bed."

"Bed! Yea!"

"Come on then – up you get," he prompted her as he took her hand to help her up. She came up out of the chair easier than he had thought she would, but then to his surprise she kept coming and fell straight into him. Catching her as best he could, he belatedly realised his left hand was on her arse.

"Oh this just gets better," he thought to himself dismally. "Somehow – this is all going to end up being my fault!"

Jack moved her over to his bed and laid her down, pulling the covers up over her; he smoothed the hair back out of her face and smiled.

"Sleep tight gorgeous," he said to her softly as he turned to gather her things and leave the room.

"Jack," she said sleepily as she grabbed his hand.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"I'm cold," she replied, shaking slightly.

"Oh…ah…okay," he said as he pulled the covers off her again. He reached a hand down to her skin – it was still slightly wet and she was cold – although his hand seemed to burn where he touched her; mentally scolding himself for not thinking of it, he grabbed the other towel he had brought down to his room. He quickly dabbed her down as best he could, hoping this would make a difference; as he moved, his hand brushed her breast through her bra. Gwen arched up into the touch – seeking more.

"Crap," he thought. Not only because Gwen was acting the way she was and he couldn't do anything to reciprocate, but because she was freezing under the wet underwear. He'd been caught in wet underwear before – and in a cold climate it was not good; this made him think of his currently wet clothing – he hadn't changed yet from his dip in the Bay.

"Okay," he thought. "Just like a band aid – quick!" Jack pulled the covers back up over Gwen – after all if he could do it in the dark and with his eyes closed – there was no reason why he couldn't take off a woman's underwear in under ten seconds whilst she was covered in blankets.

Eleven seconds later, he smiled at his spoils as he held Gwen's wet, red, lacy underwear aloft.

"Hah! I've still got it," he said out loud. He looked down at Gwen's now sleeping, smiling face and wondered how he was going to be able to explain this in the morning.

"Oh well," he thought. "Might as well not worry about the storm until it breaks."

With that last thought, he leant down and kissed Gwen lightly on the forehead before gathering all her clothes and heading to the showers to get himself warm.

Jack dressed in some fresh clothes, and hung Gwen's clothes over a railing to hopefully dry before morning. Making himself a coffee, he went to his office to stretch out as best he could and tried to relax; leaning back in his chair, he put his hands behind his head.

"Forget she's ten feet away," he willed himself. "Forget she's in your bed – naked!"

Jack hadn't realised he'd dozed off until he heard the ringing. "What the hell is that he thought?"

The annoying ringing stopped finally. "When did I change my ringtone?" Jack thought sleepily, before he started to doze back off.

That was short lived however when the ear piercing scream began.

Jack jumped out of his chair, reaching for his gun holster – which was strangely absent from his waist. He looked around for the source of the noise – then he remembered. And then he realised – Gwen was awake – and seemingly fully aware and unappreciative of her situation.

"Jack!" she screamed.

"I can explain," Jack yelled back from where he stood, unwilling to get any closer to the hole in the floor. He couldn't remember anything in his room that Gwen could use to throw up at him – but he was sure that wouldn't stop her.

"What the FUCK am I doing in your bed!?" Gwen yelled.

"Ahh…I told you I can explain," he tried again.

"And why the FUCK am I naked!?"

"If you would just calm down a minute…" he tried to reason, realising immediately that was entirely the wrong thing to say.

"Calm DOWN!" Gwen screamed. "CALM DOWN JACK! Is that what you just said?"

"Well…yes…" he replied sheepishly.

Gwen cast around the room, the sheet grasped to her chest like a life preserver.

"Where the hell are my clothes?"

"Down in the shower room – I'm trying to get them dry," he replied reasonably.

"Dry?" Gwen thought to herself. She was getting tired of yelling up through a hole in the ceiling.

"Jack – get your arse down here!"

"No way missy!" he yelled back.

"Jack!" she yelled.

"Promise you won't throw anything at me," he yelled to her.

Looking around Gwen frowned – there was nothing to throw anyway – but there was her gun!

"Okay Jack – I promise," she said sweetly.

Jack started to move to the entrance, then stopped. "Or shoot me!" he added.

"Damn," said Gwen under her breath.

"Gwen!?"

"Yes! Okay then Jack – I won't shoot you either – just get down here."

Jack climbed down the ladder and turned to face her.

Gwen looked at him like she could spit venom. "So Jack – explain!"

"Okay," he started. "But you've got to listen to me – no interruptions."

"Explain!" she bellowed.

Jack sighed and then began to relay the tale of the night, from the Karaoke to how she ended up in his bed.

Gwen sat there and listened to his story without interrupting.

"You expect me to believe that?" she asked.

"Yes," he replied without hesitation.

"Well – I don't," she replied.

"Hey! Are you saying I'm lying to you?"

"Hmm…let me think! Yes!"

He looked at her amazed; after all he'd been through for her tonight.

"Well – I can prove it!" he replied.

"Oh yeah!? How?"

"Well – the Bay should be obvious – we'd have the CCTV footage of it here in the Hub."

Gwen thought for a minute – he had her on that one.

"And the club?"

He smiled widely. "I'll be back," he replied as he flew up the ladder and out of the room.

"Jack," yelled Gwen after him. She heard the sounds of the Hub door opening. "I don't have any clothes," she finished softly as she sat in the middle of Jack's bed.

Jack jumped in the SUV and raced towards the Pub; the CCTV footage of Gwen's Karaoke performance would prove he wasn't lying to her. It would more than likely scar her forever – but hey – she was a big girl! "She's a big girl alright!" he said out loud as he remembered his feelings as he stood there, while a fully conscious and naked Gwen was in his bed! His soon to be obvious arousal was another reason he had made such a quick exit.

A short while later Gwen heard the Hub door opening again. "Please be Jack, please be Jack…" she repeated like a mantra.

"Hey," came Jack's voice as he stuck his head through the hole.

"Thank God it's you," Gwen replied. "I would've died if it had've been one of the others. Where the hell did you go?"

"I've got a surprise for you," he replied smiling. "Coming up?"

Gwen just looked at him. "Are you going to get me some clothes?" she asked.

"Yours are probably still wet," he reasoned; then a grin came over his face. "But I could always get naked too – if that'd help."

"You're a riot Jack!" she replied, plastering a fake smile on her face. "Get me some clothes!"

"Okay," he replied as he stood. "Talk about bossy!"

Jack ran down to the shower room where he kept most of his clothes and returned with the smallest pair of jeans he owned and a button down shirt. "Here you go," he said as he threw the clothes down to her. "Sorry I don't have any women's underwear," then he paused. "Well – none that would fit you anyway!"

After a few minutes Gwen emerged from his bedroom; the clothes were a little roomy on her – but she looked amazing thought Jack.

Gwen paced the room, unable to stand still; she was nervous about what his surprise was. What was really eating her though – was wondering whether she and Jack had had sex last night. She would never forgive herself – or him – if they had. Firstly, she thought, for cheating on Rhys; and secondly – for finally having slept with Jack and not remembering it.

Jack passed her a strong coffee and some pain killers as she sat on the couch; she'd demanded to see the tape he got from the pub – and he'd told her she'd better sit down.

"Uh, oh…" she thought.

She watched herself on the screen as she moved on the stage. "Cringe-worthy choice of song," she thought, (even though she really liked that song). "But nothing too bad so far." Then it got a whole lot worse!

Gwen watched in silent horror as she threw herself at Jack – then she was between his legs! "It can't get any worse," she thought. Then she had the urge to throw a cushion over her face as she did when watching horror movies, as she witnessed the celluloid her straddle Jack's lap and start grinding – yes GRINDING! – into him. Then she passed out and the tape stopped.

Gwen looked at Jack, her face the colour of beetroot. "If he so much as cracks a smile," she thought to herself. Surprising her though – he didn't; he just stood there looking at her.

It took all the self control Jack possessed not to laugh right then; but he felt like what had happened was his fault. He didn't think Gwen had embarrassed herself – he loved her performance – as did everyone else in the pub; and she sang really well. But he could tell that any attempt at assuring her of that would be futile – so he just stood there and watched her.

"Oh God!" Gwen thought. "How do I ask him if we had sex?" She decided just to come out with it.

"Did we have sex?" she blurted out.

Jack's eyes widened. "Do you honestly think I would take advantage of you like that?" he asked.

"Just answer me Jack!" she pleaded.

Jack's head dropped, then he looked her straight in the eye, hoping that how hurt he now felt showed fully in his gaze. "No Gwen – I never touched you – except to get your wet clothes off so you wouldn't freeze!"

Gwen believed every word he said, and now felt bad about doubting him – especially seeing the look on his face.

"I'm sorry Jack," she apologised softly. "But I had to ask."

He smiled a little then.

"What!?" she asked warily.

"You didn't really have to ask," he replied in a deep, sultry voice.

Her heart rate rising a little, Gwen swallowed. "Why?"

Jack walked to her slowly, placing a hand gently on her cheek when he reached her; leaning forward he whispered in her ear.

"Even though you may have been too drunk to remember with your mind – your body wouldn't have forgotten."

He pulled back from her then, dropping his hand and moving to sit down behind his desk – leaving Gwen craving the close contact.

"So…" Jack began, breaking her train of thought – which was nowhere where it should be. "Are we good?"

Gwen looked at him and smiled. "Yes! We're good!"

Jack smiled. "You're lucky I'm a gentleman Gwen Cooper."

"Yeah – lucky me," Gwen replied almost a little sadly as she wondered how she was going to explain her all night absence to Rhys, let alone turning up in Jack's clothes – minus underwear!

Jack watched her as she sipped her coffee – lost in her thoughts; hoping she was thinking of him.


End file.
